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Brenda Clayton, Beth Gregan, Sarah Beaumont, Laura Barrett and Denize Kirk, who make up our Bereavement Team, said:

Despite what many people might think, there’s no right or wrong way to grieve and grief is unique to everyone. We often find that people worry that they need to have big plans for Mother’s Day, especially if they have children whose Mum died.

For some, it might be the first year since a loved one has died, or you might not be able to see loved ones or remember that person in the same way you’d hoped, because of the pandemic.

We would suggest you have open and honest conversations with your loved ones about what they’d like to do on Mother’s Day. You might find the below advice helpful, especially for children:

Don’t feel like you have to do something just because it’s Mother’s Day

Sometimes people feel like that they have to do something extra special but don’t be afraid to make Mother’s Day a ‘normal’ day. Speak to your loved ones, especially children, about how you’d like to spend the day.

Talk about special memories

You might find it helpful to talk about the person who has died and special memories that you have of that person.

Make or buy a card for Mum or someone special

If children want to make cards, don’t discourage them. It might be an opportunity to make cards, put them somewhere special and talk about memories. Or, instead of writing a Mother’s Day card, ask children if they’d like to make a card for someone else who is special to them.

Tip for teachers

Give all children the opportunity to take part in Mother’s Day classroom activities instead of assuming a grieving child wouldn’t want to take part.

Most importantly, look after yourself

Recognise what is right for you and your loved ones and children, and remember it’s OK to be upset.